"Say Goodbye to Sleep"

Hi everyone. Steve here. I'd just like to take a moment to say thank you. I appreciate your advice. I really do. We have no idea what we're doing, so the heads up on baby strollers, carriages, the existence of meconium...I am grateful. However, I think I'm full up on the comments that once the baby arrives, I will "never sleep again." 

First of all, this technically isn't advice. It's a taunt. And it's usually told to me through a knowing smile and a sadistic tone that screams, "Now you will share in my sleepless pain! Hahahaha!" Yes, that's an evil laugh. Because you're an evil person who delights in my suffering. 

Second, yeah...I know I'm not going to sleep! There's nothing I can do about it. I can't store energy by sleeping more now, then unleash it in 5 months. I want to just enjoy the time I have in peace...but I can't even appreciate a good nap anymore, because all I hear is your collective voice saying, "I hope you enjoyed that while it lasted! Hahahahaha!! I am evil incarnate!!" 

Third...This is something you tell a person being hunted by a nightmare demon. It has nothing to do with caring for a newborn baby! Nope! Nothing at all!!

Fourth...I love sleep. So you telling me I will no longer be doing it is like saying I'll never watch Star Wars again. It's just mean. So, again, thank you for your advice. But let's stick to advice, and put the sleep talk to bed.